Am I Enough?

Here at Trash Panda we support a lot of people, in a huge variety of walks of life. One of the most common feelings we can all relate to I’m sure, is that of not feeling that you are enough or like you are not doing enough to be happy and/or successful in life.

We see it a lot, new mums trying to juggle it all and never letting on it’s getting too much. Young men trying to live up to a society’s pressures of being a “man”. Folks nearing retirement and just feeling they are losing their “purpose”.

Our anxiety can start to spiral, our self worth hit an all time low… it can all feel too much!

The mortgage, price hike in electricity, MOT due, phone bill past due, the kid’s uniform needs washed, your friend is needing your support.. all while your mental health starts to crumble and that feeling you are trying but failing to do everything and you are all alone.

STOP! Please, dear reader just stop for a moment and take a deep breath in and exhale!

One of the biggest triggers to this feeling is the constant need or desire to measure ourselves against our ideals. But our ideals, by definition are not attainable - they are images of perfection we set, not realistic goals we should actually strive towards.

Stop here and let’s try to think a little differently, start to measure yourself against goals or targets you set that (and this is key) are realistic! Say you want a show home clean house but you barely have 30 minutes a day to clean it… then set the goal of freshening up a room a day and boom… YOU HAVE ACHIEVED SOMETHING! Not a show home perfection we see in the magazines but something better, something that is a big deal for you!

Contrary to popular belief and that annoying motivational tag on Instagram - we do not have the same hours of the day as Beyonce! What irritates me about this phrase is that it is so incredibly wrong because unless you have millions in the bank, her status across the globe, her staff including chefs, nannies, cleaners etc… then NO, you do not have the same hours in a day. And in addition to the crazy comparison on a lifestyle level alone - the reason we should never compare to another person is because no two people are having the same journey and your struggles vary vastly from that of your neighbours!

Don’t look to others for comparison, don’t look at the model in size ten jeans and starve yourself in the hope you can look like her. Reality check time, you have different DNA, so no you’ll never look like her. Starving yourself is not healthy and often leads to binge restrict cycles - if you truly want to loose weight, please do it in a healthy way! Oh and finally, odds are even that model probably doesn't look like the model in real life - life is an illusion caused mainly by photoshop skills being easily accessible to anyone with a mobile phone!

Remember to question what is truth in what you are using for comparison.

But ultimately it’s time to be kind to ourselves and to understand who we are! Our capabilities are very varied and so we need to start setting realistic goals based on YOUR own life! I’m not saying sit back and do nothing but if you want to run a marathon but have never run a day in your life, you start on a couch to 5k not by entering London marathon and winging it!

We only get one life, and yes you could spend it racing for that 1st place or that unattainable ideal life OR you could find happiness in balance and acceptance. Life will always be busy, it may always throw us some struggles to cope with and challenges to face but putting additional pressure on ourselves does not help this.

If you have read this far it's safe to say you might connect with some of what has been said and something has gotta give here - please don’t let it be your mental health that goes! Look after you first, if the plane’s going down we get told to put on our oxygen mask first before helping others. You’re no use to anyone if your burnt out and hating your life!

It is ok, I know it can feel a lot, it can feel too much and we often feel alone and drowning. Between the day to day stresses of life and then more demanding challenges thrown in… it’s a lot and somedays just getting out of bed is an achievement in itself. But you are certainly not alone in feeling this way and you are definitely not alone in dealing with this, we’ve got you! If you need to talk drop us an email on info@trashpandahq.com.

Oh and just in case you don’t realise it - you are enough!!!

Witten by Katy Forrester

Co-founder & Director